Easter Weekend!

Right now it is snowing! How weird is that! Last year's Easter I went roller blading (badly) in Hyde Park and the next day walking in beautiful rural Essex.

This year has been different! It's been freezing cold. On Thursday night I was having a bath, when my bathroom heater decided to conk out on me! Nothing like getting out of a warm bath into a freezing room!

The Good Friday service was beautiful. Our assistant Vicar, who used to be an actor, organised a Passion Play. This involved readings from the gospel and inviting the congregation to use their imagination and participate during the crowd scenes e.g at the Last Supper when Jesus says - "One of you is about to betray me", they all whispered, "Surely not I?" Or when the crowd shouts to Pilate to release Barrabbus, they all shouted, "Release the criminal".

The tech team helped play the sound effects - 'wind rustling in trees', 'stamping feet', 'Passion of the Christ'-like background music.

Dave, who used to be head of tech team (but hasn't fully grasped what 'stepping down' really means) was in charge. He was tired, cranky and at one point, quite short with me because I did not understand a technical term. So straight after the service I went home before I could get even more annoyed!
On the Saturday evening, Trudi and I went for the 'London Safari Newly Single' meetup in a pub in Farringdon. There were a couple of guys I really got along with- Taz from Malaysia and Suguru from Japan. Lovely guys!

Sunday morning, I opened my front door to this...

So funny to see Yati in braids! I was just so excited to see her back from her holiday in Jamaica, and to hear all the stories she had to tell! Not to mention the 63% proof Wray and Nephew rum she brought back with her -we'll be making a lot of cocktails in the near future!

The braids didn't last long - she'd taken them out by evening!

Clare and Phil hosted lunch at their place, so a group of us went over and chilled. Afterwards, I dropped in at my nephew's who greeted me with a scowl and "What are you doing here?" Clearly I should visit more often! I stayed only 10 minutes - it just felt too awkward.

To further add to the awkwardness, I found my sister Ngonzi back at the flat helping Yati with her hair. She totally blanked me when I said hello and rebuffed any efforts to start a conversation. Clearly she's decided not to forgive me (she hasn't spoken to me since September!!!) Well if she wants to be like that!

So it's been an eventful Easter with highs (the meet up, Trudi, Yati, lunch at Clare and Phil's) and lows (Dave, Immanuel and Ngonzi)

In a weird place

It's coming up to the long Easter weekend! 4 whole days off work! Yati is away on holiday. Apart from church, there is not much else to do.
Times like these make me think nostalgically about my church in Uganda -Kampala Pentecostal Church. I really miss my friends. The problem with nostalgia is that one tends to gloss over the bad bits and everything takes on a rosy haze! It wasn't ALL good, but at least it was better than St Barnabas.

Last Sunday's 5pm service was about friendship. The preacher made an interesting observation, have you ever noticed that when you walk into a Christian bookstore, you won't find any books on Friendship. In fact this was the first sermon I've heard on the subject. It is mentioned in passing in Singleness seminars, as if the subject is only relevant to Singles. The group I sat in to discuss the sermon were all married couples with children. They felt that they didn't have time to invest in friendships because of family committments. One of the guys said to me
"It must be easier for you to make friends because you are still a student"

Aside from the fact that I am not a student, it isn't!! I still find it difficult making friends at St B's.

This is how it goes...
-we meet in church on Sundays,
-at house group on Wednesdays or
-at worship practice on Thursdays.
There is no time to have conversations or build close relationships within the limited time. Also we are focussed on whatever is at hand -be it the service, bible study or worship practice.
People seem quite happy to know you within the 'church' context, but always give the impression that they are busy at any other times.
Just this morning, a guy in my House Group put on Facebook that he'd just got engaged. We've been in the same group for over 2 years and I didn't even know he had a girlfriend! See what I mean?

Maybe it is just the culture of London. People prefer to keep things impersonal- it is easier that way! The cost of a good honest solid friendship seems to outweigh the benefits.

I miss my prayer partners Mboni and Shifa; hanging out with Sharpe, Sam, Trinity, the Gospel dancers; spending nights at the Ojera's; having tea at Ricky Eyaru's or Ronnie Mananu's; having people drop in at my home; being invited to my friend's family parties. That just doesn't happen here.

Jesus told us in John 15:12 to love one another as He has loved us. It says somewhere else in John I think that the world will know that we are Christians because we love each other. This is one of the things that make us stand out from the crowd! I'm sorry, but love isn't restricted to insincere, 'How are you's? and "Fine's" said with fake smiles on a Sunday morning.

The church leadership recently introduced a 'Getting to know each other' section in the service. Questions are put up on the powerpoint to help members of the congregation have a 5 minute conversation with someone they do not know. It's a start. I don't know whether it will address the real issue. Maybe they should get us to arrange a coffee date instead of just chatting at church. That would require more effort and take people outside their comfort zones.

I've been trying to change the mindset of the people in my House Group ever since I joined. We start every year with a resolution to develop better friendships... the year goes by and then it is time again to make the same resolution. I organise about 90% of the socials. I guess I should be grateful that at least 10% gets done by the others.

I wish there was a way to bring about lasting change?

Murder Mystery Flop

I should have planned it better!

1) The food was late
2) Guests were late
3) Some of the major characters didn't even bother to show up,
4) A few guests were not really mingling and needed a lot of cajoling to get them to participate
5) The murder victim was supposed to 'die' before dinner. However he could only do this after he'd had a few confrontations with certain guests. This was difficult because said guests turned up late or didn't show!!!
The food was getting cold!
I pulled him aside and said "Sod the guests, I need you to 'die' now!!!"
He nodded as though he understood and then I saw him wandering around the room, not dying!!
So I announce to the room
"Dinner is ready, and 'Big Jim' would like to make an 'announcement'".
I nod at him meaningfully as this is his cue to start the speech, that will set off the set of events leading to his death, i.e. lights go off, a loud gunshot is heard and then he 'dies' in dramatic fashion.

Instead he threw open the shutters to the kitchen and announced to all the guests
"Dinner is ready!!"

(groan)

It all went downhill at that point!

So while the guests were eating, he decided to 'die'. Of course, at this point people were more concerned about their dinner, and consequently there was very little reaction to his 'death'

We had a couple more 'deaths' later on in the evening- still no reaction. They were a hard crowd!

And then I forgot to give the inspector the 'Evidence'

Some said they enjoyed themselves!

I felt so bad!

Where did it all go wrong! I've organised 4 of these before and they have NEVER flopped!!!!

I'll need to do this again to convince myself that I am not a failure!

Ignorance!

Sometimes you are confronted with ignorance that leaves you speechless!

At Home Group we were discussing an upcoming Besom project. Besom is a charity that helps to bridge the gap between those who want to give time, money, things or skills and those who are in need.
The guy we’ll be helping in a couple of week’s time is a widower whose wife just died from AIDS. He and his son are not coping very well.

Well, as you can imagine we were all excited, me especially because I feel as a church we need to be out there in the community helping people, instead of hiding in our ‘holy huddles’

Martin has health and safety concerns about the HIV

???

Apparently, he once had to turn down an application from a student who wanted to join his martial arts academy that had Hepatitis B, because he discovered that this could be transmitted by contact of any bodily fluid, including sweat. He concluded,

“We just don’t know enough about HIV and how it is transmitted.”

Huh?

Maybe it is because I’m from Uganda where there is an ongoing public awareness campaign about HIV. But you’d have thought that a 40+ year old, middle class Briton would not be so ignorant.

So what is he really saying? That we shouldn’t help or interact with this guy because he might have HIV?

Anyway, it’s not like as if we will be exchanging body fluids with the guy or his child? The most we’ll do is probably clean, paint and decorate- hardly the type of activity that would expose us to the virus. We wasted about 20 minutes of valuable house group time addressing this ‘issue’. There was talk about protective clothing, masks, gloves etc! All the time I was thinking “What the fuck!”
I told them
“I don’t know about any of you, but I will not be wearing protective clothing against HIV. I have interacted with people who have HIV. I have hugged them, and I don’t think I’ve got it. But if I do, then ya’ll at risk because at some point I have hugged and kissed you!”
Can you imagine how the guy would feel if we all turned wearing anti-contamination suits?
I was soooo upset!!!

Thoughts on 'Albertine'

A friend lent me Brooke Fraser’s album ‘Albertine’ named for a Rwandese orphan whose mother, during the 1994 Rwandan Genocide, laid down her life to save her daughter.

Would I lay down my life for someone? “Probably not”… self- preservation features quite high on my list of priorities.

However maybe I am not as selfish as I think. There is this time someone threatened to hit my mother with an iron bar. My brother and I stood in front of her, totally willing to take the beating. My only thought then was to protect her. So I could possibly lay down my life for someone I love.

But would I do it for someone I didn’t even know in the way that bodyguards, firemen, Aid workers in war zones, law enforcement officers etc do? Whenever they go to work they are putting their lives on the line.
I wonder how often we show them and their families’ appreciation?

Would I do it for someone who hated me? You know, like Jesus did?

You see, at just the right time, when we were still powerless, Christ died for the ungodly. Very rarely will anyone die for a righteous man, though for a good man someone might possibly dare to die. But God demonstrates his own love for us in this: While we were still sinners, Christ died for us (Romans 5: 6 – 8)

What about all those missionaries who go out into territories that are hostile to the Gospel? I hear about the underground church and torture stories in China, and also stuff like those South Korean missionaries who were abducted in Afghanistan last year. What is it about Christianity that makes non-Christians feel so threatened!!!

But even if I was not able to make the ultimate sacrifice (i.e. death) and instead interpreted ‘laying down your life’ as putting aside your creature comforts, time, money for the sake of someone else, could I do that?

This has been such a challenge for me. A friend with mental health problems has nowhere to stay, and has been phoning up to ask for my help in accomodating her. I don't know how to deal with her illness (even though she was sectioned, she doesn't think she is ill), besides I have no room. I told her that I couldn't put her up, but she still phones me to ask. It's got to a point where I have started screening her calls. I feel so guilty! Surely the Bible tells us to love one another, even when it is uncomfortable! But how do I show love to my friend? What would Jesus do?

I still have a very long way to becoming more like Jesus!