AFRO vs DREADLOCKS

I am trying to decide whether to start growing dreadlocks 'Rasta' style or not! Last weekend I put in temporary 'locks' using gel, to get a feel for what I would look like with them.
If I do decide to go ahead with it, I will use 'beeswax' which is permanent! Meaning if I ever grow tired of the dreads, the only way to get rid of them would be to shave off ALL my hair!!!!!

It's a BIG DECISION!

Afro -Pros

1) Shows I'm proud of my African roots
2) I can go swimming without worrying about messing up an expensive hair style

Cons

1) High maintenance -I have to plait my hair EVERY night so that it's soft and pliable enough to comb through the next day. Then it takes AGES to put into shape!

2) I can't wear a hat, lean against anything or walk in very strong wind because it knocks it out of shape!

3) Bits of my hair scattered all over the flat

Dreadlocks- Pros

1) Shows I'm proud of my African roots

2) Very low maintenance- run fingers through hair - and go!

3) Associated with creative hippy types (I think I am one...)

Cons

1) An Unfortunate association with Rastafarians

2) Can't wear hat (none big enough)

3) Can be messy and therefore not very professional!

4) The first 2 months, I am not supposed to wash my hair so that it locks into place. This can be quite smelly!

I don't know what to do!!!!!!!!

Parla Italiano?

This year for my birthday I am making another pilgrimage to my beloved Italy! Yati has found some cheap flight deals for June! We'll hire a car and spend a week touring wine country! Throw in a couple of handsome guys and we are set!!!

This time I've decided to do something different! Learn how to speak Italian!!!

Last year in Venice I learnt how to ask very basic questions like how much? (Quanto?) Where is? (Dove?). This was great, but the person I was asking would reply in a rapid torrent of Italian- stopping mid flow at the look of complete bewilderement on my face

'Non ho capito?" (You don't understand?)
"Non capisce!" (Not a chance in hell I got that!)

I bought 'Italian for Dummies' but it was a bit heavy on grammar so I exchanged it for a simpler one called 'Teach Yourself Italian - Italian Starter Kit' which claims that I can learn how to speak basic Italian in just 7 weeks. This morning I learnt...

Andiamo a Italia? (Let's go to Italy)
Mi piace l'Italia. Il solo, il mare. il vino...(I like Italy. The sun, the beaches, the wine...)
Andiamo a Venezia in Aprile! (Let's go to Venice in April)

Not bad! And all from memory! I'm off to a good start!

Survived Valentines...

Such a relief that is has finally come and gone! Despite previous post (numbing myself) I did pray that God would give me a date on Valentines.

Nothing happened!

The cinema called me in the afternoon to ask whether I was available to work since they were short staffed
"No I can't... I've got plans"
I didn't elaborate that the 'plan' was to show up at the cinema with my mates to watch a film for free. That scuppered that one!
So when I got home, I lit candles all aorund the living room and read 'Adrian Mole- The Cappuccino Years' - at least I had a good laugh!

The day before I'd sent an email to my sister - pouring my heart out about my feelings of rejection at this time of the year. She came back with a slap in my face exhorting me to be more proactive by doing something with my friends instead. I'VE BEEN PROACTIVE FOR THE LAST 15 YEARS OF MY LIFE!!!! Give me a break!

But you know... the grass is greener on the other side

I asked my married friends what their Valentines Day plans were. The majority HAD NO PLANS! Even the newly weds!

"It's expensive. Why waste £100 on just one day!"
"February the 14th isn't the only day in the year when we can celebrate our love" (neither is Christmas, Mother's Day, Father's Day...)
"He doesn't do flowers or cards"

The general impression is that for them Valentines day is no big deal. I bet when they first started dating it WAS!

Where has all the romance gone?
Makes me think. Do we Singles place too much stock on Valentines Day?

On another note:

My church House Group volunteered to cook the Alpha course supper on Tuesday. It was really fun and the punters seemed to like the food. Especially one of the guys who I find particularly attractive. He's got lovely olive skin, dark hair, long eyelashes, athletic body (broad shoulders, narrow waist) beautiful smile and plays the piano beautifully! I've always admired him from afar but have never said a word to him. I was serving the food and he came up for seconds saying he really LOVED it! Music to a chef's ears! He later came into the kitchen to personally thank us again for a wonderful supper 'The best I've had on this Alpha course"

I just stood there grinning like an idiot!

The next day I was bemoaning this fact to my friend and confidante Simon (expert on all 'Men' affairs) and he says
"If a guy you like compliments something you do - TALK to him...... at least you could hint that if you like it that much I'll make it just for you someday, if he supplies the wine!!!"

Maybe the 'numbing' isn't such a bad idea after all!!

Valentines Day Looming

Valentines Day is good for business. I hear this is the busiest and most profitable time for florists, card shops and chocolatiers. Restaurants have been booked out and in my local Tesco, the seasonal Valentines Day aisle has made a reappearance.
There's just no getting away from it!
London Christians recently invited speaker Debbie Maken who wrote Getting Serious about Getting Married: Rethinking the Gift of Singleness . I really wanted to attend her seminar. But to be honest, it was not to listen to Debbie. I just wanted to meet available single Christian guys. At the last minute I decided not to go. And with good reason. All the Singles events I've been to, there's always too many women and too few men. What would be my chances of standing out in the crowd and meeting somebody? Debbie commented on her blog

'What struck me more at both talks was the ratio of Christian single women to men. I had sixty attendees at the first talk, and double that at the second. Both times, it looked like there was a 3:1 or 4:1 female to male ratio. It was disturbing on many levels because even though most all of the men attendees told me that my book had inspired them to be serious about getting their affairs in order and pursuing a wife, it was plainly evident that there would still be a large number of single women left holding the bag. As we all know, I refuse to redefine their unwanted single state as something more glamorous than what it is, I refuse to flatter them and tell them that they are whole single people when they very well know that they are not, and I refuse to tell them that church work or something else will make up for the lack of a spouse and family. So, what now in this modern conundrum?'

I've decided to numb myself to the whole singles/ relationships thing. Much like the same way I’ve numbed myself to shoes. I never find any that I like that fits. Whenever I go shopping, to avoid disappointment, I don't even look at or go into shoe stores. I've got to be the only person on earth who doesn't buy her own shoes. My sisters do that for me - after they've grown sick of seeing me in the same shoes for 3 - 4 years! I'm still good for another year! ;-)
It’s the same with guys. The ones I like don't like me! And the ones I don't like, like me. The Security guard at work was chatting me up yesterday. Gave me his whole life history and his future plans! Said that he is from Ghana and his family don't mind if he married someone who wasn't Ghanaian - like from Nigeria, England… Uganda! He was ok – a bit on the short side (5’5) A supply teacher – maths and is looking for a full time job now so that he can stop doing security work. I was polite. I went 'umm, arm, how interesting!' NOT
He asked if I was free to go out on a date. “‘Unfortunately’ I work 7 days a week mornings and evenings.” Okay I lied a bit, but don’t want to encourage him. He is not interesting enough to date! How can I explain this! I like guys who are different! Who are unique and march to the beat of their own drum; whose list of interests and hobbies is wider than just football! I’m now convinced that such a person does not exist for me and rather than just ‘settle’ I might as well just numb myself to it
And what better time to practice than on Valentines Day!

Baby Steps...

Spiritually I am feeling more optimistic.
Last Sunday I hooked up for lunch with Laura from church. I knew her from the choir in my old Pentecostal days. We've agreed to meet up once a month to pray together and charter our spiritual progress. She’s quite spiritual – every second word from her mouth is straight out of the bible... verbatim. Hopefully it will rub off on me!
I also bought a new bible and a daily devotional guide . It's early days, but I have been studying it every morning for the last 3 days.
So going well!